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Parents, don’t dress your girls like tramps

Though I’m still not a parent (as most of you know) I have interacted with students on a daily basis in my career since I was 18.  Therefore I’ve always been interested in articles that have to do with student/youth culture and recently I read a great article on CNN.com that I thought was worth sharing. The article challenges parents to think twice about what they let their kids wear. I decided to underline the thoughts I resonated with.

by LZ Granderson CNN.com

Grand Rapids, Michigan (CNN) – I saw someone at the airport the other day who really caught my eye.

Her beautiful, long blond hair was braided back a la Bo Derek in the movie “10″ (or for the younger set, Christina Aguilera during her “Xtina” phase). Her lips were pink and shiny from the gloss, and her earrings dangled playfully from her lobes.

You can tell she had been vacationing somewhere warm, because you could see her deep tan around her midriff thanks to the halter top and the tight sweatpants that rested just a little low on her waist. The icing on the cake? The word “Juicy” was written on her backside.

Yeah, that 8-year-old girl was something to see alright. … I hope her parents are proud. Their daughter was the sexiest girl in the terminal, and she’s not even in middle school yet.

Abercrombie & Fitch came under fire this spring for introducing the “Ashley,” a push-up bra for girls who normally are too young to have anything to push up. Originally it was marketed for girls as young as 7, but after public outcry, it raised its intended audience to the wise old age of 12. I wonder how do people initiate a conversation in the office about the undeveloped chest of elementary school girls without someone nearby thinking they’re pedophiles?

What kind of PowerPoint presentation was shown to the Abercrombie executives that persuaded them to green light such a product?

That there was a demand to make little girls hot?

I mean, that is the purpose of a push-up bra, right? To enhance sex appeal by lifting up, pushing together and basically showcasing the wearer’s breasts. Now, thanks to AF Kids, girls don’t have to wait until high school to feel self-conscious about their, uhm, girls. They can start almost as soon as they’re potty trained. Maybe this fall the retailer should consider keeping a plastic surgeon on site for free consultations.

We’ve been here with Abercrombie before — if you recall, about 10 years ago they sold thongs for 10-year-olds — but they’re hardly alone in pitching inappropriate clothing to young girls. Four years ago the popular “Bratz” franchise introduced padded bras called “bralettes” for girls as young as six. That was also around the time the good folks at Wal-Mart rolled out a pair of pink panties in its junior department with the phrase “Who Needs Credit Cards” printed on the front.

I guess I’ve been out-of-the-loop and didn’t realize there’s been an ongoing stampede of 10-year-old girls driving to the mall with their tiny fists full of cash demanding sexier apparel.

What’s that you say? Ten-year-olds can’t drive? They don’t have money, either? Well, how else are they getting ahold of these push-up bras and whore-friendly panties?

Their parents?

Noooo, couldn’t be.

What adult who wants a daughter to grow up with high self-esteem would even consider purchasing such items? What parent is looking at their sweet, little girl thinking, “She would be perfect if she just had a little bit more up top.”

And then I remember the little girl at the airport. And the girls we’ve all seen at the mall. And the kiddie beauty pageants.

And then I realize as creepy as it is to think a store like Abercrombie is offering something like the “Ashley”, the fact remains that sex only sells because people are buying it. No successful retailer would consider introducing an item like a padded bikini top for kindergarteners if they didn’t think people would buy it.

If they didn’t think parents would buy it, which begs the question: What in the hell is wrong with us?

It’s easy to blast companies for introducing the sexy wear, but our ire really should be directed at the parents who think low rise jeans for a second grader is cute. They are the ones who are spending the money to fuel this budding trend. They are the ones who are suppose to decide what’s appropriate for their young children to wear, not executives looking to brew up controversy or turn a profit.

I get it, Rihanna’s really popular. But that’s a pretty weak reason for someone to dress their little girl like her.

I don’t care how popular Lil’ Wayne is, my son knows I would break both of his legs long before I would allow him to walk out of the house with his pants falling off his butt. Such a stance doesn’t always makes me popular — and the house does get tense from time to time — but I’m his father, not his friend.

Friends bow to peer pressure. Parents say, “No, and that’s the end of it.”

The way I see it, my son can go to therapy later if my strict rules have scarred him. But I have peace knowing he’ll be able to afford therapy as an adult because I didn’t allow him to wear or do whatever he wanted as a kid.

Maybe I’m a Tiger Dad.

Maybe I should mind my own business.

Or maybe I’m just a concerned parent worried about little girls like the one I saw at the airport.

In 2007, the American Psychological Association’s Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls issued a report linking early sexualization with three of the most common mental-health problems of girls and women: eating disorders, low self-esteem and depression. There’s nothing inherently wrong with parents wanting to appease their daughters by buying them the latest fashions. But is getting cool points today worth the harm dressing little girls like prostitutes could cause tomorrow?

A line needs to be drawn, but not by Abercrombie. Not by Britney Spears. And not by these little girls who don’t know better and desperately need their parents to be parents and not 40-year-old BFFs.

(You can find the original article HERE)

 
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Posted by on April 20, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

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Beating Negativity

I have been called “negative” at least a couple of times in my life.  More than ever I ‘m waging war with this and am regular shifting my thoughts from negative to positive, learning how to find opportunities behind each setback.  I recently read the below article and thought it was worth sharing. I even printed out a copy to hang on the fridge and attempt to put into practice.

9 Ways to Beat Negativity – by Jon Gordon

1. Tell yourself a positive story. Life is a story. The story we tell ourselves and the role we play in that story determines the quality and direction of our life. Successful people are able to overcome adversity by telling themselves a more positive story than the rest. Instead of a drama or a horror movie, they define their life as an inspirational tale. Instead of being the victim, they see themselves as a fighter and over- comer. You may not be able to control the economy, but you can influence the outcome of your story.

2. Model yourself after success. Are there people in your industry succeeding today? Of course there are. Seek out those people in your industry and ask to meet with them. Learn from their advice and model their attitudes and actions. If they can succeed, so can you.

3. Focus on the important stuff. Tune out the negative voices and start making positive choices. What are you doing on a daily basis to grow yourself, your team, and your business? Don’t focus on the negative things other people and the media are saying. Instead, focus on marketing your business, taking care of clients, and building loyal relationships. Every morning ask yourself this question: “What are the three most important things I need to do today that will help me create the success I desire?” Then take action on those items.

4. Replace “have to” with “get to.” This simple word swap can change your mind-set and your approach to work and life. It turns a complaining voice to an appreciative voice, and acknowledges that life is a gift—not an obligation. So often we grudgingly say things like “I have to go to this meeting,” “I have to meet with this client,” or “I have to make a bunch of phone calls.” In reality, it’s not about what we have to do. It’s about what we get to do. Research shows that when we practice gratitude, we get a measurable boost in happiness that energizes us and enhances our health. It’s also physiologically impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time.

5. Refuse to participate in the recession. Professionals who’ve thrived during past recessions continued to go about business as usual regardless of market conditions. They worked hard and focused on taking actions to grow their business. As others are paralyzed by fear, take the opportunity to charge forward.

6. Boost your marketing and advertising. It may seem counterintuitive to spend more money on advertising and marketing right now. But with so many of your competitors cutting back in these areas, this is a great opportunity to build your brand and gain market share. People are still buying and selling, and they will buy from those whom they trust and see in the marketplace.

7. Create a positive vision. Instead of being disappointed about where you are, make the decision to be optimistic about where you are going. Create a positive vision for your future and the future of your team. Vision helps you see the road ahead and it gives you something meaningful and valuable to strive towards.

8. Invite others on your bus. Invite colleagues and customers to board your bus for a positive ride. Send them an e-bus ticket at www.TheEnergyBus.com. Share your vision with team members and ask them to join you in making this vision a reality. Be a positive influence.

9. No more complaining. Abide by the “no complaining” rule. When you realize you’re about to complain, replace your thoughts and words with positive actions. Let your complaints help you identify what you don’t want so that you can focus on what you do want. The key is to turn complaints into solutions.

(You can find the original post HERE on Jon Gordons Blog)

 
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Posted by on January 12, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

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Dads determine how sons will handle stress

I read this article tonight and found it interesting.  My first response was: “duh!” I don’t think most dads consider how their relationship during the formative years will have lasting effects in their sons life…negative or positive.

By Sharon Jayson
USA TODAY

SAN DIEGO � Men who say they had a good relationship with their father while growing up react less to day-to-day stress as adults than those whose relationship with their dad was poor, new research suggests.

The study was among those on parents and kids presented at the four-day annual meeting here of the American Psychological Association, which ended Sunday.

Participants included 912 men and women ages 25-74 who were interviewed by phone each day for eight days. They were asked about psychological and emotional distress and if they had experienced stressful events that day, such as arguments, disagreements or tensions at work or home.

“Fathers and sons seem to have a unique way of interacting that cuts across time and has lasting effects,” says co-author Melanie Mallers, an assistant professor of psychology at California State University-Fullerton.

Among other research:

•An adult child with problems has a negative impact on a parent’s mental health, even if the family’s other kids are successful, finds a study of 633 parents and 1,251 adult children.

“If you think your kid is a problem, it’s going to make you unhappy,” says co-author Kira Birditt, a research assistant professor at the University of Michigan-Ann Arbor.

Having even one child with physical, emotional, lifestyle or behavioral problems negatively affected parents’ mental health, the study found.

•Adolescents underestimate the degree to which their peers are bullied, according to an online study of 1,454 young people ages 12-17, by researchers at the University of California-Los Angeles.

At least one incident of school bullying was reported by 77%; 72% reported having been bullied online. But when asked how much their peers may have had similar experiences, just 61% thought peers were bullied in school, 50% online.

The term “bullying” was not used; students were asked how frequently “mean things” happened to them in the past year. “Mean things” was defined as “anything someone does that upsets or offends someone else” and included insults, threats or sharing embarrassing photos.

“It may be the case that cyberbullying is especially painful for youth if they think ‘I’m experiencing this alone. It isn’t happening to any of my peers. Why just me?’ ” says co-author Guadalupe Espinoza, who worked with other co-authors, including Jaana Juvonen, a UCLA professor of developmental psychology who has conducted past research on bullying.

(The original article can be found HERE)

 
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Posted by on August 18, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

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History That Could’ve Been

I read an article today I thought was pretty interesting. It was about a speech prepared to be delivered by President Nixon if Niel Armstrong died during the moon landing. It’s pretty eerie to think about, but it underscores just how dangerous the mission really was. Must be weird to write speeches for events that could take place, I wonder what other unspoken famous speeches exist out there?

Here’s the text of that Nixon speech that was never given; (thank God)

On July 20, 1969, Neil Armstrong and Edwin “Buzz” Aldrin became the first men to walk on the moon. The following speech, revealed in 1999, was prepared by Nixon’s then speechwriter, William Safire, to be used in the event of a disaster that would maroon the astronauts on the moon:

Fate has ordained that the men who went to the moon to explore in peace will stay on the moon to rest in peace.

These brave men, Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin, know that there is no hope for their recovery. But they also know that there is hope for mankind in their sacrifice.

These two men are laying down their lives in mankind’s most noble goal: the search for truth and understanding.

They will be mourned by their families and friends; they will be mourned by their nation; they will be mourned by the people of the world; they will be mourned by a Mother Earth that dared send two of her sons into the unknown.

In their exploration, they stirred the people of the world to feel as one; in their sacrifice, they bind more tightly the brotherhood of man.

In ancient days, men looked at stars and saw their heroes in the constellations. In modern times, we do much the same, but our heroes are epic men of flesh and blood.

Others will follow, and surely find their way home. Man’s search will not be denied. But these men were the first, and they will remain the foremost in our hearts.

For every human being who looks up at the moon in the nights to come will know that there is some corner of another world that is forever mankind.

(taken from; watergate.info)

 
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Posted by on April 20, 2009 in Uncategorized

 

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