Finished Beyond Identity this weekend and thought I would share my thoughts on it. It came highly recommended from a dear friend in Michigan, so highly that she actually bought me a copy. [TIP: Whenever someone close to me is willing to buy me a copy of a book that increases greatly the chances that I will in fact read it.]
I found the book to be very relevant to where I am at both personally, spiritually and professionally. Keyes took a unique approach of blending psychology & theology to address the important issue of Identity. Where many well-meaning Christian authors have asserted that Christ followers are supposed to find their identity solely in Christ, Keyes diggs alittle deeper, offering more than cliques and bumper stickers.
He begins by sharing how our identity is under attack, even lost. In the opening chapters he shares how our identities are shaped by; morals, models, dominion and love. Our Morals bring our sense of meaning and purpose in life. For some things are more valuable to us than others. Somethings are worth living for and others worth dying for. These morals we hold arent out there somewhere but rather become very much part of us, part of our identity. Then there are Models…or maybe better said heros & heroines. Whether real or imagined, these are the people we are striving to be like. We see qualities lived out in front of us or on a screen and we say subconsciously; “I want to be like that.” Dominion has to do with our mastery over things. Could be work, a hobby, even how we use language. When our dominion is oppressed by outside forces, it has a negative effect on our identity. Lastly Love Keyes asserts is connected with Dominion, but differs slightly. Our sense of self is also determined greatly by love received and love given.
I would say the thesis of the book exists in the title and how the author says we get our identity. Who determines our morals? How do we know what is heroic or who is someone we should immolate? How do we express dominion and love in appropriate ways? Our answers to these questions is key for it determines where we derive our identity from. Without reading the book I’m sure you understand that our identity is shaped from many places and sometimes comes from within. We answer the question: “Who am I?” in many ways, there’s the traditional; I am my job, or I am my relationships, I am the sum of my poor choices…I am a golfer, I am a pleasure seeker, I am an addict…etc.
The middle section of the book parses out how and where we should derive our identity from. Instead of trying to explain this important chunk of the book, let me share with you a profound summary statement found within chapter four;
Our sense of identity is not found by effort of self- integration, by trying to relate all of our roles, feelings, attitudes and relationships to this central self. It is from this self or heart that God intends us to have total confidence in him and our status as his children. Our sense of identity is found by looking first to God from our innermost selves and letting our roles, feelings, attitudes, and relationships find their place in relation to him.
The last section of the book practically addresses how our identity relates to issues like reconciliation, anger, marriage & family and our view of personal sin. Our identity effects greatly our relationship with others and with ourselves.
I would definitely recommend this book. Though “heady” and “psychological” at times, I found it also to be quite practical. Maybe that had alot to do with the fact that it was relevant to where I find myself in my life. Either way, if you want to explore finding your identity BEYOND your job, your wife, your hobby, your childhood…you fill in the blank…then pick up this book and see what God might surprise you with. I will end my review with this great quote which Keyes ends his book with;
“I am not what I ought to be; I am not what I would like to be; I am not what I hope to be. But I am not what I once was; and by the Grace of God, I am what I am”
— John Newton
Did you ever read Donald Miller’s classic work “Blue Like Jazz“? If you haven’t you definitely should check it out…especially if you are NOT a Christian and might label yourself sceptical of them & or God.
Awhile back I mentioned a book I had seen a 
